Thanksgiving

For the first time in a few years, I actually shared a Thanksgiving meal, which included turkey, cranberries and pumpkin pie!

Stealing the fabulous idea from my sister, I'm going to make a list of things I'm thankful for (in no particular order), since I got to feel the thanksgiving vibe over this past weekend despite being so far from Canada!

1. Matt

2. Siblings that are not just related to me, they are also my best friends.

3. Parents who continue to love me for exactly who I am

4. The hippee commune that I grew up in

5. God's sovereignty and provision

6. Technology - because it makes family & friends seem much closer then they really are

7. The Atkins Family

8. Earl Grey Tea

9. Sunsets

10. Good advice

11. Popcorn

12. Children

13. Photographs

14. Gum Trees

15. Loud music

16. Good conversations

17. Massages

18. People who say "how are you?" and mean it

19. Family meals

20. Airplanes

21. Laughing so hard you cry

22. Love

23. Chocolate and Peanut Butter Ice Cream

Freedom in Love.: The Mission to Jamaica

It's always interesting to reflect on where I was years ago. Here's a blog I wrote (which seems like a life time ago!) after the one and only mission trip I've ever been on, but which lead to me being open to travelling, living overseas, studying theology, and perhaps going back to Jamaica one day :)

Freedom in Love.: The Mission to Jamaica: Isn't it ironic when you do something with the intention of helping someone else...but then end up being the one blessed by the person you s...

The Bar

Back in my late teens/early 20's I went every now and then on a Monday night to a non-denominational worship rally held at the Canadian Christian college where hundreds of Christian youth-adults would gather. I found it both a refreshing and challenging time, and it gave me a lot of strength during a couple of difficult years as well as teaching me new things as I became an 'adult' in my walk with God.

I'm pretty sure it's the first place I had heard people speaking in tongues, and seen people slain in the spirit, and without opening any sort of ethical or theological discussion on that fact, it was an interesting experience having grown up in the Salvos and never being apart of anything like that before. I had several amazing encounters with others and with God that still blow my mind to think about, but that isn't what has caused me to remember those Monday nights of my youth.

Aside from any of my thoughts on the 'worship' aspect of these nights, there were some amazing speakers. I didn't agree with all of them, and I'm sure they didn't all have it worked out, but nonetheless, each week I felt challenged and encouraged by the words spoken at these Monday night meetings.

There is one speaker on one night that has always stuck out to me, and it's a preach that I've often reflected on when challenged about something personally or by those around me in this particular area.

More or less...this is what he said...

There is bar we have as Christians. A bar that we use to measure up our life choices and decisions, what we use to determine right from wrong.

As we live out our lives as people of the church we start to forget who set that bar, and instead turn our eyes to one another.

We look over at Fred over there and say to ourselves, 'well...at least I'm not doing THAT like he is' and the bar gets lowered a little bit. We then look at Susan over there and say to ourselves, 'well... at least I only do it once a week, not every day like she does', and the bar gets lowered a little bit more. Then we see Tom over there and say to ourselves, 'well...at least I still go to church, unlike him' and the bar gets lowered a little bit more.

This continues, usually without us realizing it, as we justify and rationalize our actions according to how our fellow brothers and sisters are living our their own lives, feeling relief and satisfaction in the fact that at least we're doing it all just that little bit better.

Before you know it, the bar is no longer where it was...far from it. It's settled so far beneath where it should be that perhaps what was 'black and white' becomes grey, and what we always 'knew' to be 'right' now seems cloudy and uncertain.

The problem is that we're all fallen, weak, sinful human beings, and therefore it will only cause us harm and compromise to compare ourselves against one another. There is in fact only one that we can be justified against...only one who should be telling us where that bar needs to be, without allowing it to slowly get lower.

That about summarizes the preach, and of course, preaching to teens and young adults it held great impact, because temptation, justification and compromise comes with the territory of growing up and learning our way in the world.

Thinking about it now though, I think it's an even bigger danger for those who are 'adults'. Teenagers have the excuse of hormones, peer pressure, high school, the influence of the media, and so forth to fall back on...and usually, eventually, they learn from their mistakes.

When you're an adult and you've come to the conclusion that you've worked it all out, that you're solid in your walk with God, or that you're a great contributor to the church and Christian community....I think you're actually at a much bigger risk at letting that bar slowly slip from where God had set it to where it's just a little bit more comfortable to suit the lifestyle you've chosen or the choices you have made. The problem then becomes, that it's a whole lot harder to admit to yourself that perhaps the bar has slipped or even to get it back to where it should be, because at least with teenagers, they're in a time in their life to be molded and formed and are just extremely teachable. It's not always the case once we hit the point of deciding that we've got things pretty much figured out.

There's probably a multitude of directions you could take the analogy preached about so many years ago to a much younger version of myself, as well as ways to discuss the theology of it or how it practically plays out.

Regardless....it's a thought someone once had to preach about to a group of a couple hundred youth, and I've got to say, it's stuck.

Probably a good thing to pop back into my mind every now and then as I take a look at my own bar, the slippery sucker that it is, and ask God to help me get it back up to where we both know it's supposed to be.

A Life Worth Following

Growing up in the church, believing in God and the journey of what that looked like goes back as far as I remember. I have memories of Sunday school and sitting in church with my parents as far back as my memories go. Saying prayers at night time, hearing Bible stories, and being involved in various programs and activities (brass band, Christmas productions, singing groups, etc).

What I also remember is how that realm of all things God related was trapped within some sort of bubble...a bubble of my own making I’m sure. It didn’t transcend so much into the rest of my life until I was well and truly into my teen years and no longer a ‘kid’. I didn’t spend a whole lot of time with friends from church, only school ones, nor did I speak a whole lot about those extracurricular activities once I was outside of this bubble.

Maybe part of that was to do with not being sure of or strong enough to stand up for what I believed. Maybe I didn’t know how the two worlds were supposed to relate to each other, never finding anyone else outside of the bubble who shared similar beliefs and activities. Maybe it was a little of both.

I have this vivid memory. I was in grade 6. The Billy Graham Crusade was in Toronto at the Sky Dome. We attended the programs that were intended for kids, as well as some of the concerts that were put on (DC Talk among others). I don’t remember what was talked about or preached on. But, what I do remember is the feeling...the revelation...of sitting in a packed stadium FULL of other kids. Other kids who obviously had a similar faith and knew the same God I knew. More than just a dozen others who shared a Sunday school class with me...this was different. We filled a public stadium, that normal every day people used all the time for normal type stuff...and talked about God!

I was on a high when I went back to school after that weekend. I was buzzing with the realisation that there were so many others. Not only that, there were these amazing people who spoke and incredible bands that played, and they all believed the same thing I did. I remember trying to share that excitement with two girls in my class. I showed a dog tag necklace I had gotten from the event and explained how the Sky Dome was full of people as we got to be part of this very fun and very cool weekend. Know what the reaction was? They laughed. They told me I was wrong. They told me I was making it up and that there was no way such an event took place and that it had to do with church or God. I did argue, and I did push..but eventually, defeated, let it go. And sadly, pretty much put it all back in the bubble and continued on as I was before...until, like I said above, several years had passed and I was well into my teens.

This story serves a point as I reflect on it. As a kid growing up in the church, I was never taught how to integrate that bubble into the ‘real’ world. How to allow what I learned and what I believed to transform me in such a way to make my life stand out because, somehow, I was different. Of course there were the typical teachings of how to be a child evangelist, encouraging us to bring our friends along to church and programs. But I lacked, as did many others I’m assuming, the ability to be wholly transformed by what I believed so that I led a life that was county cultural and stood out from what everyone else was doing.

Now today. I’ve done and learned a lot of things. I’ve gotten a degree from a theological college, and I have worked for over 10 years for The Salvation Army is varying capacities. There is no keeping my beliefs in the bubble, even if I wanted to. Due to where I have chosen to work and study, it is automatically presumed that I am a Christian. It’s no longer a matter of keeping hidden what I believe, but needing to make an effort to not compromise how people view those who do believe in God by what I say and do. In many effects, it’s an apologetic work as I strive to show those who have been hurt by the church or ‘religion’ in some shape or form what it really means to know love from God.

Now, let’s draw the comparison from my earlier story from when I was in grade 6. The problem with kids and God is that often they don’t know how to make it ‘fit’ into their ‘normal’ life...how to bridge two worlds, two cultures, and to have it all make sense in one lifestyle. Compare this to the life of adults and God. There’s probably still the same issues kids face, but going with my examples of where I currently am, the difficulty now lies with people knowing I’m a ‘Christian’ and therefore being judged on the fact.

I’m all for pride, stubbornness and just not caring what people think of me (I think something to that effect was said in the matron of honours speech at my wedding!). But how about instead of saying, it’s not fair to be held on a higher pedestal because I go to church, or, it’s my life and I can choose how I live it regardless of what people think......we actually embrace the opportunity to use our very life, the decisions we make and words that we say, to remake people’s views of religion, God and the church.

How about we suck up that pride and stubbornness and say, because people are watching...I am therefore going to make a decision about where I work, what kind of house I live in, where I choose to travel, how I spend my free time, what I do with my income, what causes I fight for, who I spend my time with....and use it all to be a living example of the transformation God has made in you?

I could argue for the fact I believe that if God has really transformed your heart, all of the above should just happen...but the reality is it’s hard, and we are a weak and broken people. The bubble is easier, cleaner, and makes it much easier to shut out what I don’t agree with about the church and it’s decisions, and means I can hide when I’m just too tired to do the ‘right’ thing.

There was something wrong with the grade 6 me, albeit not all of it was my fault. However, knowing what I do now, I will actively work towards using my natural red-headed stubbornness and pride to make my life one that is worthy of being dubbed as someone who knows God.

I Spy With My Little Eye

I’d consider myself a very ‘observational’ person. As a kid, this was probably more correctly labelled as ‘nosey’, but as an adult I’ll simply say that I’m just observant.

There seems to be a lot of negative news, down trodden spirits and just tired and worn out people at the moment. Every day Matt and I have been finding ourselves met with sad conversations or just people who have forgotten how to smile. Call it the time of year, blame it on winter, or say that it’s the end of school term. Whatever the reason, it sort of gets to you after a while. Matt so rightly reflected a couple days ago that it was just starting to get him down.

What good is being observational if all you observe is sad, heart wrenching or stressful? There may be a more than the usual stressors and difficulties around at the moment...but perhaps part of the problem is that it’s just so much easier to get caught up in the negative, then to allow our eyes to capture the beautiful and optimistic moments. I’m sure that they are there, despite how cold it is outside, or that it’s week 10 of the school term. It’s just time to start looking for them.

So...I will reflect on the good news and smile worthy moments of the past week or so...

- Two different sets of friends have received a happy and healthy baby. Thank God for new life!

- I spent my lunch hour at the primary school I work at on Mondays playing ‘what time is it Mr Wolf’ with a dozen preps who all seem to have much bigger feet then myself as they always ended up at the wolf before me.

- I watched my husband and his team win their basketball grand final, and then receive free pies to celebrate from the man who owns the petrol station where they hang out for a drink and chat after games.

- I talked to my sister for 2 hours who has just recently returned to Canada from Haiti. And despite her being half asleep by the end of it, thoroughly enjoyed the catch up and entertaining stories.

- I had a lovely dinner at the in-laws, and feel very blessed to know that even though my family is just so far away, I still have people who love spending time with me (and feeding me!)

- I got to hang out with 40 children, parents, leaders and others from our Reservoir community for Family Squads. It was pretty much chaos...but the good kind that you can only get when running programs in Reservoir.

- Played the most intense and vicious (I didn’t cheat I swear...) game of Pit that I have ever seen! But more importantly spent that night with some very lovely people to celebrate Darryn’s birthday.

- Enjoyed the company of my best friend and partner over the weekend as we had time to stay in bed until noon, have a walk in the sunshine, and enjoy a brunch of delicious French toast.

Well, I have to say...I now have a smile on my face and am feeling the most positive that I have felt in a while. Just because I took a few minutes to think of the highlights of my past week.

Happy glasses are now on...and I will be on the lookout for more ‘magic moments’.

What’s yours?

To become an 'Atkins'...

Lets see if you can keep up with this...

We got married in January in Canada, but then returned straight after our honeymoon to Australia.

As soon as we got our marriage certificate, we applied for my partner visa (a VERY expensive visa might I add) which takes up to 9 months to process. We're four months in, and recently called regarding the status, but apparently it won't even get assigned a case worker and looked at for at least another 2 months.

I can't get my Australian drivers license changed without other ID in my married name, as well as the marriage certificate, as it was an overseas wedding. So the plan has been to get my passport changed.

We've been waiting to have enough money to get my passport changed (which you have to mail to the Canadian consulate in Canberra), and finally got around to sending my current passport, our marriage certificate, my birth certificate and a $100 fee to have it changed to my married name. A couple days later, we get a letter back saying I have to re-fill out the form and mail it in id WITH my married name (although the whole point of getting the passport was to get something with my married name on it....) as well as have a guarantor sign my form that is not a minister of religion or pharmacist or physio (which is acceptable in Australia, but not in Canada) so finding someone who is a police officer, a bank teller or notary (and has known me for 2 years...) is on the list of things now to do...

So...I can try again to get my Australian drivers license. but I need to apply with Victorian births, deaths and marriages to have my name changed (if I can prove I've lived here for longer than 3 months and am considered a 'permanent' or long term resident....which I have no idea if waiting for my partner visa counts for that). And in order to put this form in, I have to get BACK my current passport and birth certificate from Canberra to prove what country I was born in and am from. Which means, getting it sent back to me from Canberra, forfeiting the $100 fee for my passport I can't get, and paying $90 to get a piece of paper that says "yes, she has in fact changed her name because she's married".

If I'm able to get the name change form....I then take that to get my license changed....and then mail that and all my id AGAIN to Canberra (and another $100....) to get my passport changed.....

And all for what??? Just so that I can "legally" show that I "assumed" my husbands last name!!

Anyone else feeling exhausted from just reading that?!?

Good grief I say....they don't make what should be a very simple process (at least I think so) easy by any means!

Once a Helpless Romantic...

If you don't know much about me, here's some quick insight....growing up I was a helpless romantic.

I dreamt of love, marriage, being swept off my feet, and one day meeting Mr. Perfect. I was told once, by my dear friend and cousin Jocelyn that I was 'in love with love.' I was defensive of course to that description, but knew straight away that she had hit the nail on the head. As if I could have argued with Jocelyn anyways...the girl who had to put up with me swooning over one guy to the next and using her to call boys for me since I was too chicken to do it myself.

Long story short, I was challenged to give that all up by the time I was 21, to stop planning out how my life should be romantically, and focus all that time and energy on more productive things.

So...present day, I'm now 5 months married to my best friend. It's amazing how now I can look back and see God's fingerprints over the journey we had in our relationship, and the path it took once I did finally give up trying to put it all together myself.

I had a wedding present for Matt, a collection of letters tied up with green ribbon, that I had to patiently hold on to for a year during our engagement...which I think keeping silent about was the hardest part leading up to the wedding.

Somewhere in the teenage years we had a youth group night based around the book "When God writes your love story". Although somewhat mushy and fluffy, it does hold some challenges for those waiting to meet the love of their life. Anyways, we spent the night writing letters to our future spouse. I wasn't entirely sure what to think of it, but the romantic in me jumped at such a fantastically sappy activity.

Regardless of how silly some of the things I wrote were, or how naive I was at the time, I kept writing these letters...over the course of about 8 years. Some were prayers for the man I had yet to meet, and others were more ridiculous. There was probably about 20 in total, with the last one being written just after I became good friends with Matt.

So, after a year engagement, I finally got to give this present to Matt. I apologized several times for how silly I might have sounded, because I couldn't remember most of what I had written (it had been 4 years since I had written the last one), and we sat and read through them together.

The result? It was amazing really. Despite how afraid I was of how irrelevant the whole exercise was, and how worried I was about sounding stupid in these letters, we got to see how our paths were coming together even before we met. During several difficult times of Matt's life, there was a corresponding letter with a prayer for him, written from the other side of the world. I had also stuck an Australian pen into one of the last ones I wrote that had gotten left behind when Matt left Canada.

I'm not going to say that I was predestined to meet Matt, or that we're soul mates that were destined to find one another, or any other hopelessly romantic statement. But, what I do love about all of this is the reminder of how things turn out when you put God in the drivers seat. When you stop trying to have control and to plan it all out, and instead just relax...trust God...and enjoy the journey!

I got to give Matt a really special gift, and together we were able to see how God was and is apart of this relationship. It only strengthened the resolve that this marriage must and will include God in it. It also served to remind me....once again....how important it is to remember what God has done in our past, if we hope to have faith for the future.

God is good.

People Workers

Children are the future.

Any arguments?

I think it’s pretty much a biological fact that the next generation of youth and adults will come from the children of today. Pretty straight forward I’d say.

If the above is true, what I find puzzling is the seeming lack of funding, resources, people and time given to children, in comparison to teenagers, adults, and the elderly.

What is so extraordinarily appealing in waiting until the little ones have hit puberty before we decide to start investing in their futures and well being?

I’m making reference more specifically to the fact that you will find (at least in my experience) an abundance of people willing to spend time with youth and teenagers...willing to run drop in centres, social clubs, Friday night youth groups, church hang outs, etc. But when it comes to the children...only a few put up their hand. And of those few, mainly females remain.

I’m an employed children’s worker. I’m in my late 20’s and have been working with kids, in a very wide variety of settings, both voluntary and for employment for the past 10 years. I consider it a privilege to be welcomed into the world of a child and to have the opportunity of journeying alongside with them. I am never bored but am instead forever being entertained, challenged, taught, and stretched. What’s not to like?

I am continually running into the problem of not having enough people willing to give of time and invest in kids who desperately need someone to care. Oh, there are many good intentions, with most people stating how much they love children. There just aren’t people who are willing to put their words into actions and actually give some time to kids (in their own communities) who could use an hour of positive attention more than anything in the world. However...I’ve been to youth events where the adults outnumber the teens, and the amount of youth workers to children’s workers funded and employed are 5:1. Never mind the fact that more time is put into youth “programs” and big flashy events, then it is into spending one on one time mentoring and discipling youth who could really use an adult to walk along side them and take an interest in their world.

If children are our future, and childhood certainly happens BEFORE adolescence, isn’t that where we should start? If the decisions teens are going to make under peer pressure, biological change, and worldly pressure are going to be at all influenced by what they have known and experienced up until this point in their lives, doesn’t that make the time of their childhood absolutely critical to helping prepare them for the hardest stretch of change, decision making, and new things they are ever likely going to face?

Childhood is fleeting, yet it leaves a lasting thumbprint on the rest of an individual’s life. Doesn’t it make it the most valuable and vital time to invest a few minutes into the next generation of youth and adults? Maybe we wouldn’t ‘need’ quite so many youth workers if the investment time was put in just a few years earlier?

I’ve heard the line, “but I’m just not good with kids” or “kids don’t like me.” Granted, there are a few people who I might want to say that to. Regardless, I was challenged recently by someone who said, “There is no such thing as children’s workers, and there’s no such thing as youth workers. There are only people workers.”

In the past, I may have argued that, stating that I believe my gifting and talents make me a children’s worker and that is the only thing I will dedicate my life to. However, experiences in the past couple of years have led me to think on the above statement that perhaps, the problem we have (specifically in the church) is not being able to train up ‘people workers’.

We tell people that they can only do kid’s ministry OR youth ministry OR seniors ministry, never crossing over between areas. But what if we taught that things weren’t meant to be this off balance? What if we were all “people” workers? Then certainly the important time and influence needed in the life of a child wouldn’t be wanting, and we wouldn’t be bombarded by people who want to join the ‘hip’ ministry of youth work leaving those age groups who maybe aren’t quite as attractive, by the way side. The needs of people would be met, not just a select few.

My heart is well and truly for children’s ministry, and I am continually amazed at the lack of people wanting to pick up on the cause that will affect the future of everyone, never mind the fact that it takes a giving of so little to make a difference in the lives of some so desperate.
However, I would like to conclude with calling you to be people workers. Be advocates for people who are desperate and without a voice, not being limited by the need to be titled and put into a box, only giving time to the groups that are easy or are the most popular to work with.

And if needs be, maybe for the first time, consider investing into kids.