Saturday, February 26, 2005

A Smile Angel

Just wanted to share my favourite moment of today.

I was downtown with Sharon and my sister tonight, meeting some interesting people. While we were walking through an underground plaza, we traveled at one point up an escalator. I must have looked sad, or perplexed, because as I glanced over to the escalator going down next to us, an elderly gentleman traveling on it held up a pair of toy chattering teeth in my direction and said "smile." That was all..and then he continued on his way.

Made my night.

Blessings!



Friday, February 25, 2005

You make me feel like dancing....

Do you know what is a fail-free way for me to get into a good mood? To dance. It works everytime. I'm sitting here right now out of breath, as I just had a frantic dance around my living room to some pumpin tunes. I usually use the excuse that I need to clean my room to blast music and then dance around my floor and jump on my bed. But it always puts me into a good mood. Between the energetic music, the release of pent up energy and the realization of how funny I must look, I always feel fantastic after.

Maybe it also has something to do with the fact that as kids, we always used to do that. Saturday morning (after the cartoons) always meant chore time. It was definitly a drag, but we always looked forward to the music. We would have the stereo in the living room just blaring, and we enjoyed whatever tunes it was that my mom put on. Between Bare Naked Ladies, The Nylons, Boys 2 Men, Rod Stewart, Garth Brooks, and oldies cassettes, we had our fill of music to dance to. It's such a great family memory for me. I remember my mom dancing around the living room with us, and we were all just so happy.

Yes, I am 22 in less then a month (holy geez!) but I refuse to ever completely grow up. I hope that I will continue long into my life dancing around my house while the music is blaring. Why move on or let go of something so positive that sets me free and makes me happy?

I just read my friend Peters blog entry from today. It's entitled "Be a kid..." Give it a read (click here). It's a fantastic refresher of what it felt like to be a kid, and how simple things were...in comparison to how complicated we make our lives when we get older. A good reminder. And it's given me even more motivation to keep on dancing.

Blessings!

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Engagement & Syrup

Jocelyn and Joseph

Jocelyn is my life long best friend, and other half. We're about 5 weeks apart in age, as well as cousins, and spent our first 17 years of life living down the hall from one another. We've been through quite a bit of the ups and downs, but always came out on top. She has been my guiding light in building my relationship with God and never gave up hope for me, even when I couldn't find it for myself. I am so proud of who she is and how she is grown. And I would just like to take this opportunity to say congratulations to Jocelyn and Jeff for their recent engagement! I couldn't have picked out someone more perfect for her! God's fingerprints are all over Jocelyn and Jeff's relationship and I couldn't be more proud or excited for them!

And I would just like to share a funny story about my other cousin in the picture above, the almost 3 year old, Joseph. Yesterday I spent the afternoon riding the TTC with Joseph, as we had gone to visit my sister at work. So apon returning to my Grandparents house, I decided to stay for dinner. We enjoyed a lovely dinner of waffles, and I managed to even finish eating without getting any syrup on me (a miracle in itself). I was sitting across the table from Joseph, and watched as he decided he was finished eating and then attempted to dump the remaining waffle pieces onto his mom's plate beside him, but ended up with them all over the table. He then shook his plate around in the air for a minute, flinging syrup everywhere, before returning it to the table. Jocelyn (who was sitting beside me) and I then watched as Joseph starting splashing around in the syrup puddle that was still on his plate. He used both of his hands to repeatedly smack the plate, getting his hands covered. As he didn't think anyone noticed him, he then moved onto his face. He fully put his face smack down into the syrup puddle, splashing into it repeatedly with his nose. And once again, as no one said anything to him, he continued onto his elbows. He got both elbows into the syrup and swished them around the plate, getting all of his lower arms covered as well. It was at this point, that I just lost it into hysterics and had to hide my face behind Jocelyn so that Joseph wouldn't think that I was encouraging him. His mom caught on that he was bathing himself in his remaining syrup and took his plate away. I then got the wonderful responsibility to take him to the bathroom and wash him off...so much for the no syrup on my clothing.

Sunday, February 20, 2005

A little Country

Last night, when I was picking up a friend, I was scanning the radio stations for a good song. I got onto the country station, and a song was playing that I recognized. When we were younger my mom used to listen to Garth Brooks all the time, so for a time my sisters and I were a little hooked on him. Anyways, the song that was playing was "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks...used to be one of my favourite songs. I haven't heard it in ages, but could still sing along to all the words (a little sad I know). Anyhow...although I don't really think that there is such a thing as unanswered prayers, but instead maybe prayers that are just answered differently then what we might have anticipated...I enjoy the lyrics to this song. I think I like them because it's something that's easy to relate to. We think we know exactly what we want (and need) in our lives to make us complete, and we pray that if God would just grant us that, then everything will work out. The lyrics are simple, and maybe a little cheesy (it's country..common now) but I thought I would post them. Enjoy.

Unanswered Prayers

Just the other night
At a hometown football game
My wife and I ran into
My old highschool flame
And as I introduced them
The past came back to me
And I couldn't help but think of
The way things used to be

She was the one
That I´d wanted for all times
And each night I´d spend prayin´
That God would make her mine
And if He'd only granted me
This wish I'd wished back then
I'd never ask for anything again

Sometimes I thank God
For unanswered prayers
Remember when you're talkin'
To the man upstairs
That just because He doesn't answer
Doesn't mean He don't care!
Some of God's greatest gifts are
unanswered prayers...

She wasn't quite the angel
That I remembered in my dreams
And I could tell that time had changed me,
In her eyes too, it seemed
We tried to talk about the old days
There wasn't much we could recall
I guess the Lord knows
What He's doing after all

And as she walked away
Well I looked at my wife
And then and there I thanked the good Lord
For the gifts in my life

Sometimes I thank God
For unanswered prayers
Remember when you're talkin'
To the man upstairs
And just because He may not answer
Doesn't mean He don't care!
Some of Gods greatest gifts
are unanswered....
Some of Gods greatest gifts
are all too often unanswered...
Some of God's greatest gifts are
Unanswered Prayers...

Thursday, February 17, 2005

"For I know the plans I have for you..."

I've been doing some reflecting today. It's a really cool thing to look back on the past year and see how God has been working. Sometimes when we follow a path God sets out for us, we don't understand why we're traveling down the road we are on. But it's always such a beautiful thing to look back at where you've tread and get a glimpse at how God has been working in your life..

In the spring last year, God told me I had to trust Him with school. It turned out, that by the time July came, I received a very clear answer from Him that I had to take this year off of school. It was the biggest leap of faith I had ever taken, and was scared. I only had one year left of my Child and Youth Worker Program at Centennial...so it confused a lot of people that I would take the year off. But I knew that without a shadow of a doubt, that this was what God needed me to do for this year.

Also in the spring, within the same conversation with God that he told me I needed to trust Him with school...He told me I needed to trust him with my finances. Previous to this conversation, I thought that I was doing really well, and had given everything that I could over to the trust of the Lord. But then He stopped me in my tracks and said..nope..school and finances...I want them.

In regards to money...there was a few things that happened, but one of them was that he told me to save 15% of my earnings over the summer. I had no idea what they were for...Until September. My dad started talking about the Mission Trip He would be going on in the new year. He had gone with this mission Team the last four years, and was enthusiastically looking forward to the fifth trip. I had never had the time, money, or interest to go on a mission, including the ones my dad went on every year. But something was different this time. I had the time off from school, I had the money already saved up in my savings account...and God put the desire in me.

So, the rest is pretty obvious I think. I went on the mission trip to Jamaica. And now, it's really cool to look back and realize how these plans all came together. I know there are lots of reasons that I took this year off of school...some I may never know. But if for nothing else, I got to go on the mission to Jamaica. And due to that fact...it's actually affected how I'm looking at September. I was unsure of if I would be going back to school to complete my Child and Youth Worker degree. But since the trip...the desire is there. There are things that I believe God is putting in motion for me that I require this schooling for. Now...there is always the possibility I won't get back into my program. If that happens..well..I won't fret. I was just meant to get a start on my plans a little sooner is all.

I think my two week trip has really impacted my perspective in a whole variety of ways. It's shown me how to cherish and be thankful for all that I have, for I am truly blessed. It's shown me how little and unimportant some things are that we North Americans tend to make into huge issues, and waste our time and energy debating about. It's given me an appreciation for what the Salvation Army is doing overseas, and how beautifully they are doing God's work. But I think it's also open my eyes and mind to what God might use me for. A passion was started in me, while in Kingston, for those kids in Jamaica. I had never before contemplated that I might be used outside of Canada, nor did I have the desire for it. But...a new perspective has begun to form. It could fall to nothing, but it also may be a whole new path for my life that God is putting into motion. Should be interesting either way...

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

The Salvation Army - Child Sponsorship

I have been trying my best not to seem like I am "guilting" the people that I talk to about Jamaica, and about the lives and situations of the kids that I met. It is just a simple fact though that we have it much much better then so many other people outside of North America. It took a trip overseas for my eyes to be opened about that, but maybe you've already come to this conclusion on your own. Anyhow, I just wanted to post this link, for the Salvation Army Child Sponsorship Webpage. If you're interested, check it out. I got to meet a lot of kids in Kingston who have sponsors through the Salvation Army, and hear them talk about their friends who help them out. It does mean a lot to them, and it does make a huge difference. So check it out and click below...

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

He made me whole


He Touched Me

Shackled by a heavy burden,
'Neath a load of guilt and shame.
Then the hand of Jesus touched me,
And now I am no longer the same.

He touched me, Oh He touched me,
And oh the joy that floods my soul!
Something happened and now I know,
He touched me and made me whole.

Since I met this blessed Saviour,
Since He cleansed and made me whole,
I will never cease to praise HIm,
I'll shout it while eternity rolls.

He touched me, Oh He touched me,
And oh the joy that floods my soul!
Something happened and now I know,
He touched me and made me whole.

Sunday, February 13, 2005

Beautiful Kingston


Kingston at night (view from the hill)

Family of God

Within the last couple of years, I have to come to realize how broken we can become as a family of believers. The Bible tells us that those who belong to the family of God are all on the same side...fighting the same fight. We are working towards a common goal, or that we should be anyways. How easily we fail this though. We spread gossip within the church and within our youth groups. We seek out those who are struggling, and just wait for them to slip and fall so that we can point out to all who will listen, what a horrible Christian they really are. Instead of looking at how far a brother or sister has come, we pick out all the faults and sins they've made along their journey, and we never let them forget them. How horribly disgusting and twisted we can be! To our own family of God! Nevermind those who have never met the Lord...

Reflecting again on my trip I was on in Jamaica, I noticed something quite beautiful near the end of the time we had in Kingston. At first I couldn't put my finger on it...I just noticed that there was something incredibly encouraging about the community and fellowship the group of 40 of us had with one another. And then I realized..there was no bickering. There was no fighting. There was no gossip, or words of negativity. The words people shared were that of encouragement, and strength. The team was always thanking one another for their work and participation on the project, and encouraging each other to keep fighting on to the end. True, near the end of the second week, when our body's were aching and we were physically and mentally drained, some people became stressed and tired, and unsure if we would ever see the end of the project. But still the smiles, the laughter, the praises to God, and the encouragement to one another remained.

As I noticed all of these things, I realized this is the family of God in it's most beautiful form. We were a family of believers, working towards a common goal of completing our project. When someone fell (and this happened in both the figurative and literal sense), there was always someone to pick them up and get them going again. Jesus was reflected in all the conversations shared amongst the team. There was no higharchy present. Yes there were those who head up the mission and gave direction, but we were all equal...equal members of the family of God.

I also noticed this reflected in the kids that we watched. They were always..and I mean always..taking care of each other. Sometimes it would be quite literally the blind leading the blind, as they took care to make sure their friends traveled to their classrooms safely, or found the destination that they were looking for. Those who were older, would look out for the younger ones. Those who had sight, or partial vision, would look out for those who could not see (although sometimes you would see it happen the other way around.) But again, what an incredibly beautiful reflection of how the family of God should look like! Working together toward a common goal...


It really doesn't take much for this to happen. It takes having the Lord present amount a community and family of believers. It takes us not putting stumbling blocks in our brother and sisters way. It takes encouraging words, and not words of revenge, hatefulness or deceit. We're not perfect and we all have sin...so we're bound to mess up more then once. But hopefully, there will be someone right there beside us to pick us up and set our feet straight again.

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtures put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." - Col 3:12-14


(For anyone who would like to see more pictures from my mission trip, click here.)

Saturday, February 12, 2005

The Mission to Jamaica

Isn't it ironic when you do something with the intention of helping someone else...but then end up being the one blessed by the person you set out to help.

I think this sums up my Mission Trip in regards to the kids I met. Just sitting here right now, closing my eyes, I am still getting teary playing the memories over of those beautiful children that I met. And they aren't tears of pity, or sympathy for the situations that these kids live in and come from...it's tears of pure blessing and joy. I have never encountered Jesus so vividly before my eyes as I did on this trip when I watched those children.

Let me tell you a little bit about my trip. We lived and worked right on the Salvation Army compound that enclosed the School for the Blind and visually impaired, The Nest, a home for visually impaired retired officers, a Salvation Army church, and other homes where officers lived who were stationed there. At the school there were students who boarded there, and some who came for the day, and went home at night. At The Nest, there were 42 kids who lived there who had either been abandoned or orphaned.

Each morning we would get up at about 6:00am (usually my sister and I were still sleeping by 6:15 and woke up to my father yelling from the male side of the building "Halsey girls..time to get up!") and we had breakfast as a group at 6:30am (grace was sung precisely at 6:30 led by the fabulous John Pierce). After eating, a different member of the team each morning would lead a short devotion. It was such an incredible way to start the day, and really helped us see into the lives of each person who spoke, and share Jesus with them. I was blessed and encouraged every day by these devotions as I witnessed so many strong men and women of God share their testimonies and tears.

At about 7am we were headed down to the site. We would walk through the school towards the back of the grounds, so we would often get to talk to a few children as we walked. One of my favourite memories is seeing the same two boys every morning play on the swings before school started. They were both completely blind, and one was handicapped and had only one good hand. With his good hand though, he would always be pushing his friend on the swing. We would shout out "good morning boys" as we passed, and they would both respond with a cherry "good morning miss!"

As soon as we got down to the site, it was straight to work. Our biggest task was putting a new roof onto the building we were repairing. So..the first job..tear off the old roof. The stronger men (who weren't afraid of heights) were up on the roof ripping up the old tin and throwing it down for us strong women to move and stack. After the tin, came all of the wood frame that made up the roof. We ended up with a heap of wood about 9 feet tall and at least 20 feet in length. We got quite a few wounds and bruises during that first week, as the tin could slice right through your skin (just ask Mark Hall), and we were after all, on a construction sight.

There were two days unfortunately during the first week that it just poured. The clouds rolled in over the hills, and the sky unleashed a downpour. We had been painting a great deal of the wood that was going to go up for the new roof by this point, so we had to quickly cover up as much of it as we could and were left without a lot to do. The guys on the roof however...they kept working. Electrical equipment and all. One of the guys decided it'd be good to stop after his arm kept buzzing from the shock that kept shooting up it. We did have only one (praise the Lord) serious accident. A ladder that the guys had made from wood was being used in the house, which now had a wet floor. One of the men were on it, and it slipped and caused him to slide his arm down a glass pain window. He was very strong about it all, and didn't utter a single complaint..even after his 15 stiches on his arm, and the 5 stitches that sewed the tip of his index finger back together.

We would work all day until 6pm (although the second week that ended up being pushed until 7, and then 11 on a couple of the final nights). We had a break in the morning, half an hour for lunch, and a break in the afternoon. I enjoyed the breaks in the mornings, as the younger kids at the school had their morning recess at the same time. After grabbing some cold liquids and a snack, a few of us would walk over to wear they were playing and hang out with them for the short time we had off. My boys that I hung out with at break were Kareem, Richard and Jamere. Kareem was completely blind, Richard couldn't seem much and had glasses, and Jamere could only see things when they were really close up. You knew when Kareem was out, because you could hear him. I could hear him shouting from when I was still at the work site "Miss Esta! Come push me on the swings!" So I would spend the next 10 minutes or so pushing 3 boys on the swings while they competed to see who could go the highest.

It was an awesome thing to see how these kids interacted. There were a few there from the nest, who had complete sight, and they would look out for and take care of those that they knew were visually impaired. No one was sitting there telling them to look after them...but they did it anyways. Just as a second nature. It was beautiful. And my dear Kareem, who had no sight, was always looking out for his friends. I saw him help his friend Shamar (who has some sight) open his snack because he was having difficulties with it. Kareem would always save the swing closest to the ground for a little boy named Mario, who also had no sight, making sure that he had a turn.

These kids loved their sense of touch. They would hold your hands and rub your arms, and your face, getting a sense of who you were. And those who could see up close, would put their face right up against yours, trying to get a glimpse of who you were. There was no fear that a hug, or holding of a hand was crossing boundaries. These kids soaked up all the love and attention that you could give them.

At the end of the day, when the sun set, we would head back up, have our cold showers, and eat dinner together. After that..there wasn't much to do. Some nights we would play cards together, or just sit outside and enjoy each other's fellowship. I enjoyed heading up to the nest to visit the kids there, although we would often have to do it before dinner, as they went to bed early. There were a few of us who went up regularly to hang out with the kids and just get to know them. Each and every one of those kids had such an incredibly beautiful spirit. You would never think that any hardships had ever crossed their paths. And they were just bursting of Jesus, and loved telling us their favourite books of the Bibles and verses.

On the middle Saturday, we took the afternoon off and went to a beach called Hellshire. It was a wonderful break from work, and a great experience to absorb the culture as it was a local beach. We ate lobster, coconut, and sugar cane right on the beach and swam in the beautiful clear water. Later that night we went out to a Chinese food restaurant for dinner, which was fantastic! (Although someone *cough* Brian *cough* ordered about 10 plates too many of food!)

At the end of the first week, nine team members went home, and four new people came. It was a hard adjustment at first because we had lost a lot of man power, and were behind on getting the roof back together. But..we put in a lot of long tough hours, and got to see our project completed. And man oh man..it's beautiful!

On the last day that we were in Kingston, my sister (Donna), Laurie White, and I had the privledge of leading the Blind Schools morning sunday school class. Donna is blessed with dramatic abilities, so she told the story, and Laurie and I helped with leading worship and leading a game. At the end, the Captain came and thanked the team for all of our work and for coming to the compound. He then asked Bob McArthur to say a few words on behalf of the team. Bob summed it all up I think we he said that we had come to give what we could to the school, and to help out by fixing their building. But we were the ones who had been blessed. Each and every member of the team was leaving having been impacted in one way shape or form from meeting and witnessing the children on the compound. I teared up as he spoke, knowing the full truth of his words, and realizing how much I was going to miss being there.

Well, I have definilty written a great deal, so I think I'm going to end it now. There is definitly a lot more to write about, regarding what else I learned, and took away from this trip, so I'll most likely get back to that in the upcoming days.

Here are some pictures though just to finish up, from my trip.


An outside view from the corner (it's an 'L' shaped building) of before and after

This is my sister and I, Sunday morning at church with all our beautiful children.


This is me and one of my boys during break time.


This is our team at the end of the second week. One of the guys in the first week brought the Canadian flag for us to all sign and leave in the building.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

I'm not in Kingston anymore...

Well, it's been a while, so I thought I should update.

I've been back in Toronto now since Sunday night. There is a lot of things that have hit and impacted me about my two week trip to Jamaica. But I am still adjusting, reflecting and praying about a lot of things since being home, so I'm going to wait a bit longer before posting something in direct regard to my trip. In short though, it was a wonderful success and we completed the project that we set out to do. I have been blessed from this trip in so many ways, and I'm praising God for being able to be a part of this Mission Team.

Last night when praying and doing some thinking, I wrote this out, so I thought I would share it. I think it's kindof my new vision and realization of what God is, and who He can be for different people. It's more then just empty words...it sums up how I witnessed God moving in Jamaica and in the lives of the children who I met.

You Are...

You are a Father to the fatherless
You are a stronghold to those who are weak
You are the eyes of those who cannot see
You hold the hand of all those who walk alone
You cry for the lost
You pain for those who are suffering
You are a healer of broken hearts
You are the smile on a child's face
You are the way home to those who are wandering
You are music to those who cannot hear
You are compassion, You are love
YOU ARE GOD