Alone....

At the risk of this turning into a posting of complaining...I'm just going to ramble a little about how I'm feeling right now. And I don't want it to be a blog of self pity or anything, but I just want to try and get into words whats going on in my head right now...

So this week has been kindof a struggle I guess you could say, for different reasons.

I've just really been feeling alone lately. And not alone in the sense because I'm single or anything like that at all. It's almost like I'm just standing still while everyone, and everything else, is passing me by. I guess it's still hard not having the group of people that I became close with around since the summer ended. And it's still a little strange not being in school. Mostly because I think I'm not constantly having something that is due, or my day being completely structured because of classes.

I feel stuck between worlds. I don't fit into the age and maturity level of the youth group at my church. Not that I don't love them to pieces, and they aren't good friends. But being the oldest person at youth events, next to the youth pastor, can be kindof hard sometimes. And then there is the older 20's group at my church. But the majority of them are married, or just at a completely different stage in life then I am. I feel stuck...and alone.

Now I definitly don't want to come off as selfish saying that I need to have lots of close friends, or anything to that extent. Just, when the above things all add up and come to one's attention all at once...it can become a struggle.

I'm kindof at a loss as to what to do right now. I know that a lot of this is a test for me to just trust it all to God and to get all my strength from Him. And I definilty don't doubt that at all, or that God has a plan for this year for me, or that He is in control. I'm just in a slum I guess...and desperatly trying to seek my way out of it.

Any suggestions?